I’ve been in a slump lately. I think it’s some kind of writer’s postpartum. Now that On the Shoulders of Giants is complete and in the editing phase, I don’t know what to do with myself. Without a working project, I feel adrift. Anchorless. And my old diversions only leave me hollow and unfulfilled.
So I was already grumpy when I sat down with the blind man this morning, but the USA Today Sports Weekly doesn’t come in Braille and I gave him my word. (Dude is a die-hard Braves fan. He listens to their games every night on AM radio. He’s also a baseball historian. Pretty amazing, really. Born blind and can still see the game in vivid detail. I never knew the difference between a sinker and a slider until he broke it down for me.)
I’m usually in awe of the blind man. Just the sound of his stick tapping the concrete will make me smile. He’s a good guy with good energy. Both are rarities in here. But today I wasn’t feeling it. I was wrapped up in my own problems. No book to consume me, no woman to love me, no rec yard, no mail, and a release date that is still thousands of days away. Me and my problems. Me me me.
But something happened as I began rattling off batting averages, OBPs, and ERAs to this guy who’s been in prison since 1986 and blind since birth. When I glanced up from the magazine and saw his unseeing eyes darting right and left, processing the information I was relaying, relishing it, I realized I was no longer annoyed. My heart was suddenly wide open, my troubles were forgotten, and in that moment, I was happy.
Why do I always forget this simple truth until it sneaks up on me? Nothing feels better than kindness. I need to practice it more often.
[This post originally appeared on malcolmivey.com in June 2016.]
Malcolm Ivey / Author 
Never one to minimize the seriousness of one’s situation, namely yours. Vs. mine, let’s say. So easy to think that I too am imprisoned, not by walls and metal gates closing shut behind me, along with the eternal vigilance of those towers whenever I might venture outside. Yet imprisoned–by the same thoughts that shut you in, they too shut me in. As you said, “Me me me.”
So thank you for the reminder of the other. And the greatest privilege anywhere in the world, to serve…that other!!
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Beautiful man, just beautiful. You know what matters in life and you also know that you’re still in human form therefore subject to the frailties of this life. Your compassionate action not only gave joy to a person in need, it gave you joy. Beautiful.
On the lighter side: I don’t have a passion for sports like I did as a kid, but growing up in NY I’m a big Knick and Yankee fan. I boycotted the Knicks until this week as they just traded Carmelo Anthony, a talented but selfish and lazy player who cherishes headlines much more than defense. And I’m somewhat excited about the Yankee’s rookie sensation, Aaron Judge, a talented player who seems fairly balanced and without the monstrous ego so many players have these days.
Peace, brother.
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